Holidays bring up a lot of emotions for couples trying to conceive. The “Happiest Time of the Year” becomes a nagging reminder of what you don’t have and no gift will be grand enough to fill the void. Of course, you’re surrounded by friends and family, but yearning for a baby can mess with your mind.
I can’t think of anything more torturous than hanging Christmas stockings by the mantle or wrapping Hanukkah gifts, knowing one is missing. A third red stocking would look heavenly next to two other red stockings that want a baby more than anything. Gifts would feel complete with a gift tag addressed to your child-to-be. These images exude completeness, yet your stomach feels empty. Or worse, someone announces their pregnancy at a holiday party while you’re struggling to conceive. It’s very hard to deal with. I know, I’ve been there.
While you can’t always control the timing of conception, you can always control your feelings about it all. Here are my suggestions:
- When you see a pregnant woman, send her loving thoughts. Emit well wishes for being able to conceive and carry a baby. Because the energy you send out comes back to you; that’s the Law of Attraction in the works. However, if seeing her makes you feel sad, take three long, slow, deep breaths. Turn grief into gratitude for being shown what’s possible for you, too. Didn’t that just make you smile?
- If your thoughts are focused on ‘not being pregnant,’ drop them like a hot potato. Project the energy you’d like to receive. While you’re in the shower, imagine that you’re pregnant right now and feel a level 10 intensity of gratitude for your bun in the oven. Hold this feeling for as long as you can. 30 to 60 seconds is good. Often times, you’ll get emotional when you do this and that’s great. It’s actually a turning point. The more time you can focus on the FEELING of gratitude, the faster your desire will manifest.
- Don’t feel obligated to attend every holiday party. December can clutter your calendar with family functions, work holiday parties, and community events. You may think going out will distract you from sadness and it might not be what you really need at this time. Get clear on what events you’re comfortable with and feel free to decline politely. You can say, “Thanks so much for inviting us! We have a family thing. We’ll be there in spirit!” Or, say, “It’s a nutty time, let’s make plans in the New Year. I’d love to spend time with you.”
- If you must show face at events, it’s always helpful to prepare some answers for inevitable questions like, “Any news?” You can say, “No news is good news, right?” or “Thanks so much for asking! You’ll be the first to know when we have an update.” 🙂
I hear women talk about their goal to conceive by the holidays all the time and it can be a very teary eyed conversation. If all you want this holiday season is a baby, I’m sending you hugs and if you’d like to talk about how you’re feeling or easy techniques you can use right now to cope better during the holiday time, give me a call. Conception Conversations are free. Text me at 732-615-8368 to learn more.
With love & gratitude,